Things you believed in high school

-If the bus is even 5 minutes late that means you don't have to go to school. It's the law you know?
-If the teacher is even 5 minutes late showing up for class that means you can leave and class is cancelled. It's the law you know?
-If you press your temples hard enough you'll die.
-Anyone who could do any sort of half assed Metallica solo was the best guitarist you knew.
-They changed the name of Kentucky Fried Chicken to KFC because they couldn't legally call it chicken anymore.
-Someone in a grade ahead of you put acid in a teachers cup of coffee and the teacher freaked out and had to go to the hospital.
-Someone in a grade ahead of you wrote a phiosphy exam and the only question on the exam was: Why? And the student wrote: Why not? And they got 100%
-Someone in a grade ahead of you wrote an exam on acid and wrote the entire essay on one line of the page
-Drug dealers laced their weed with cocaine. Anytime you got really stoned you'd claim that it was laced with something. But why would a drug dealer add a really expensive drug to their weed at no extra cost?
-If you go to Jane and Finch corner in Toronto you'll get shot guaranteed.
-Cyprus Hill smoked six pounds of pot in one day.
-Dean is wearing a gas mask on the album cover of Ween's the Pod because the band members were huffing aerosol through the entire recording.
-A guy tried to cross the border with sheets of acid taped to his chest and he got nervous and started to sweat and all the acid entered his skin through osmosis. He freaked out and now he's in Kingston's metal hospital because he thinks he's a peach tree and the nurses have to water him.
-You know a guy who knows a guy who owns a bait shop that sells worms to McDonald's to make burgers out of.
-You know a guy who knows a guy who owns a lumber yard that sells saw dust to McDonald's to make burgers out of.
-Hoverboards are real but the government has made them illegal.
-Rob Zombie was on tour and stopped in Kingston to go trick or treating.
-A family in your neighbourhood went on vacation and when they came back all their stuff had been stolen except for their toothbrushes and their camera. They keep using their toothbrushes and when they get their film developed it's pictures of the burglars sticking their toothbrushes up their asses.
-If you eat Mr. Noodles raw you'll get cancer.
-If you eat raw hotdogs you'll die.
-There is a park in your neighbourhood where: you'll get stabbed, raped, pregnant, people worship Satan and sacrifice animals, older kids get drunk and beat the shit out of younger kids that come in.
-When you get your license there will be something to do.